blood-red-rain

[WARNING:] [ I'd like to let you know, before you read this, that this blog is a constant stream of my thoughts as they come and go and lead to other thoughts and conclusions. There is little to no explanation for most of these thoughts, so I apologize if my musings confuse you. If you would like further explanation, simply ask and I will be more than happy to share and explain.] _____________________________________________________________ It's raining. The smell of damp earth is soothing on a spiritual level. A long talk with a close friend, teaches me more about myself. Understanding my own insecurities helps me battle them. Def

It figures... I know it's a bad idea, I KNOW it's only going to make me feel WORSE... but still, i can't help myself from looking at all those old pictures... The wedding ones are the worst. It didn't take more than 3 seconds. 1...click on the link and glance over the captions 2...feel a bubbly warmth inside my soul 3...realize I'm alone and my finger is naked and feel an excruciating emptyness overwhelm me. I'm trying to make it right. I feel as if I'm rotting, eroding away, I'm surprised this pain doesn't kill me! But that's just inside. Outside, I'm a responsible and aspiring young woman with all her dreams in sight. Well, all

As i sit here, i listen to the screeching of the wild green parrots outside... i feel the warm breeze caress my cheek with the scent of seaside and fruit... i taste the lingering flavour of strawberries, which are at season's peak here in Florida.. and i think fondly back to my meeting today with an official at the Art Institute, who basically said "you're in"... and despite all of this... something inside me is uncomfortable..... something just doesn't feel right... i think back to when i shared those words with the one person i crave right now : "you know, i could have everything i ever wanted, and i still wouldn't be happy if i we